How do you deal with loss of a parent? Not death but more in terms of losing a relationship that you have known your whole life…
I have a few friends that this has happened to, they have lost a relationship with their parent(s) due to someone not agreeing with their sexuality or just not fitting in with the family. Well my loss was due to alcohol. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and have recently cut her out of my life.
Why, you might ask? Because it was for my own sanity and health. Was it right? I don’t know. I am struggling greatly with this decision.
Is she okay? Has she crashed her car while drinking and driving? Has she lost consciousness once again? These are the questions I ask myself everyday.
My brother has called me selfish and a terrible daughter but he wasn’t there at 12 years old helping her off the floor and giving her bath with her vomit stained clothes still on. He wasn’t there when my father was working out of state and my mother was in a drunken stupor bringing another man in our home. He didn’t see the sacrifices I made as a child to parent my mother. After all this time, I think I have every right to be selfish.
I really don’t want to use this blog post as a platform to bash my mother. I want to use it as a means of bringing people together who have dealt with this type of loss. I want to be able to share, as well find peace within each other and our actions. I’m not asking for sympathy. I just need people to help the healing process and I’m hoping this will turn into something incredible for myself and others who’ve dealt with similar situations.
But I would like to continue to write about this time in my life…it seems to be helping just writing about it and sharing…. I’ll write more soon.